Sunday, August 10, 2008
Anyone who knows me well, knows I don't drink a lot during the day, b/c I go and don't stop. However, when I do stop and drink I can't get enough. It's nothing for me to have two or three glasses of water/tea with dinner. It's just enough to get me to the next time. Well I've noticed that not only am I that way phyiscally but spiritally as well. I get so busy, run so hard, even in church---things can't fill the thirst daily enough for me to be satisfied. Right now, my heart has been spiritually dry. I have been discouraged by others actions and attitudes in the church. I'm fearful of there lack of desire to see God move, but instead them move and be honored. I've been frustrated with the lack of passion and integrity. However, through all of these feelings and emotions: God has held me quite, close, and still. When I've wanted to stand and speak, He has kept me quite and seated. When I've wanted to move on, He's not released me from where I am. I am once again out of town for work, and this morning as I woke up early to drive out of town God started to move. I always enjoy driving and listening to sermons, worship music but then also turning it off and listening to what Jesus has for me. This morning, there was a great deal of silence was very uncomfortable. I realized more of my weaknesses that I desired too. I realized that I'm thirsty! This morning God provide just a taste of hope for my thirst. He showed me that there is revival in the hearts of His people and it can start with me. I don't need to wait for a week long event or a huge church wide celebration. I saw eldery pray at the atler with the young, I saw the church gather and hold hands in celebration of what God's done and is going to do. I saw families upon families not only worship together but pray at the alter and serve together. It was incridable. Families had passion and love for each other, the church, community and cause of Christ that overflowed. I want my lifesong to overflow from my heart that His love speaks through me. This drop of hope made me excited! I want more, I'm not satisfied. I drove a little further this afternoon and took a nap in the hotel resting in God's promises. I woke up excited and ready for more, so I went to another church tonight and it was the same way. I was blown away. I didn't forget but did lose focus that God is alive and active. I don't have to worry about the problem makers, the people that are only in this world to please and look after themselves, the prideful, the cheaters, and the liers. I'm responsible for me and my actions and attitude. If I want revival, it's up to me and the condition of my heart not anyone elses. I'm thankful for the worship and fresh breath of life I have tasted and seen today. It's provided me with hope. Please pray that God continues to move and move in me so I don't lose focus again. Please pray that I don't get so frustrated and discouraged by others and the sin in there life that I stumble and fall into an attutide that does not honor Christ. Pray that God continues to fill this thirst and increase the desire for more. Please pray that others gain desire and thirst for Christ and His loving power. Pray that God moves in my heart and provides direction to the times that I'm clueless and just hanging on by a thread. Pray for relationships that can built to hold myself and others accountable for our attitudes and actions. Pray for the Glory of Christ to be shown in my life but also in my church, job, community, and the people I come in contact with daily. Pray for God to be glorifed and Satan to be bound from the thirst that I have.